The Lord Provides.

The Lord provides. I can't tell you how many times I said this phrase during the past week and half. We serve such an incredible God, who is able to meet all of our needs and do so in ways that we cannot even begin to understand or comprehend (Ephesians 3:20). 

It all started last Friday, the hours before we were scheduled to fly to Haiti. We get a text from Pastor Steve saying that our flights have been cancelled and to pray. This was already after we had debated even going on the trip because of the civil unrest that had been going on in the country. However, it had seemed that the Lord had provided, in numerous ways, for us to go. So needless to say, this came as a curveball to us all. My immediate thoughts and prayers were, "Lord, if this is you slamming the door close on us going, please let us humbly accept that. Give us the discernment to make a wise choice that is not our seeking to please our selfish desires." Within hours, the Lord provided. We got another text saying that we were able to get new flights and to report to the church a couple hours later than originally scheduled. Come to find out, these new flights were cheaper, left later in the morning (meaning more sleep, praise the Lord), and would get us to Haiti at the same time. We were also refunded in full for the flights that were canceled! Wow, God! Thank you for making it clear that You still wanted us to go to Haiti! It was almost like he was rewarding us for our faith and for seeking to be his hands and feet in Haiti (Hebrews 11:6). This was just the beginning of the Lord's provision. 

Throughout the week, the Lord provided for us more times than I can count. He was (and is) so, so good to us. I would have to write a book in order to tell you about everything that he did, so I will just tell you about a couple that really touched my heart. After we all made it safely to Pignon, along with all of our luggage and supplies (the Lord provided), we were able to get to work on Sunday after church. Initially, we were planning on only having to demo the roof of the church in Savanette, as well as one or two walls. However, as is custom in Haiti, plans changed. After that first demo day, we learned that the church now wanted to have all of the interior walls knocked down as well. This meant demoing seven to eight concrete block walls, along with a two-foot tall stage/platform area. Again, after the first couple days now, I was thinking, "No way. No way can we get all of this done. We have to take down all these walls AND get the new roof on? Not happening." I should really stop doubting God and the plans that he has. These thoughts that I was having were really, honestly probably true. WE couldn't do all of that, not by ourselves and in our own strength at least. But again, the Lord provides. We had some of the best Haitian workers working with us this year that we have ever had. We hired seven Haitians to work alongside of us for the first three days. After that, we kept four of them on the work site to help us the following couple days. I have always seen good work ethic in the Haitians that we work alongside, but this year, I witnessed them work harder than ever. The Lord provided us with the manpower, energy, strength, and tools we needed to get the job done. Not only that, but He provided us with safety while on the worksite. Even with all of the demolition going on at one time, no one got hit with flying debris or anything of the sort. He kept us safe on all of the ladders we used and all the boards we sat on and walked on putting the roof up. He gave us strength to raise the tresses without any hitches. He gave us energy to work long days in the beautiful, hot, and sunny Haitian weather. The Lord provided. 

On the medical side of things, the Lord also provided. For the first time ever, we had a surgeon come on the trip with us. He was able to make some good connections at the hospital in Pignon early in the week. On Thursday, they did not take as many people with them to the medical clinic as they usually did. That left them with a couple extra seats in the pickup on the way home. So, for the first time ever, the team decided to take a couple women back with them from the clinic, to the hospital for an x-ray for one and eye drops for the other. The Lord provided those extra seats and the connections that had been made earlier in the week. While at the hospital, the x-ray took hours longer than expected, but guess what, that was the Lord providing because as they were finally about to leave, they heard some commotion in the courtyard. Two motos had collided head on, each with three passengers on board. One man had already died and they were pulling the others out of the back of this pickup truck. Immediately, those medical professionals that were there from our team jumped into action to help in any way they could. After multiple hours, they had helped saved the life of one of the young man and had stitched up multiple head lacerations on the others. Although this was very traumatic and emotionally straining, it was still the Lord providing. 

Now, as I am writing this, I am sitting in the hospital with the love of my life. I would be lying to you if I said that it was easy for me to believe that the Lord will provide for this situation. I know that sounds foolish, right? After everything that He has done for us this past week, why would He not provide through this now? He cares for the birds of the air and the flowers of the field, how much more does he care for his children (Luke 6)? Now hear me out, I know that He is going to provide, but I have to choose to believe that. I have to consciously make that choice to have faith in His promises, to have faith in His goodness, to have faith in His planning, His timing, and His purpose. I believe that He will provide. I have to look past the current situation, the pain that Miranda is in, the tears that are being shed because there doesn't seem to be much that brings relief, and the discouragement of not knowing what is wrong. I have to look past that and believe that God sees the big picture, not just the snapshot of now. I have to remind myself that the Lord will provide. I know this, I believe this, but God also has his own way of reminding me. 

I have seen God reminding me that He will provide (because He always provides) in one very specific way while here. On Tuesday, Miranda came into the ER and after a few hours, the medical staff here thought best to admit her for the night. Originally, she was going to be in room 302. However, as they were taking her up, we were told it had been changed to 316. Now, you can't tell me that God doesn't have a sense of humor because who else would just change her room number to 316? In case you aren't aware or are missing the connection, 316 is a reference to the Lord providing. In fact, it's in reference to the Lord's ultimate provision, His provision for us for eternity. 

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16

I couldn't help but to be reminded of this every time I walked into this room. It was a constant reminder that God has already provided for us for all of eternity, not just in this life! Those who believe in Him will have eternal life! No death, no life, no angels, no demons, no sickness, nothing on this earth can separate us from His love (Romans 8:38-39). Needless to say, it was a gracious reminder from the Lord that He will provide. Always. Forever. No matter what. Trust in Him. Trust in His promises. The Lord provides. 

Update: Guess what y'all? The Lord provides. We now have answers as to what has been causing all of the pain! Miranda has some tiny ulcers in her stomach, but the main source of her pain is coming from an ulcer that has formed a ring in the lining of her esophagus. Now, the doctors have a more targeted approach to combatting the pain and discomfort. After four long days and three long nights, we should finally be taking her back home tomorrow afternoon! Thank you all for your prayers, love and words of encouragement! 

 

Woah, We're Halfway There.

First of all, if you didn't sing the title of this blog in your head, I'm a little disappointed. Go ahead and look up Livin' on a Prayer by Bon Jovi. 

Anyways, it's true, I am at the halfway point of my summer in Haiti. Technically, I'm at the halfway point of my time here by myself before Berean's youth team arrives, but I'm not going to ruin a good title. Time has gone by so quick! Some of the days have been slow, but the weeks have been fast. I have been to a total of 48 churches so far, which is just two short of how many I planned on visiting altogether! At this rate, I'm visiting 12 churches a week. I am aiming to make it to another 30-40, although Jephthe believes I can make it to all 121 churches. I hope that he is right! The visits have been going so great. Personally, they are very humbling for me and I have been so appreciative of the opportunity that God has blessed me with to do His work. At each visit, I take pictures of the church and the leader. Then, I have a list of questions that I ask them, with the help of Elisee, a friend of mine who I hired to translate for me. At the end, I ask them for three ways that I can be praying for their church and three ways that I can be praying for them personally. It has been a joy for me to see how encouraged the leader is after the interview because they know that they aren’t forgotten. Almost every leader has asked that I pray for the financial situation of the church, but also for their family as well, because they don’t make enough to support themselves through the ministry. Many of the leaders also do not have their own housing and ask that I pray about that as well. Jephthe’s ministry here in Haiti is such an encouragement to me because I see the impact that these churches are having for the kingdom. The churches have anywhere from 50 to 400 people in attendance each Sunday, with the largest church having 10,000-15,000 people!

This past week, I was extremely humbled and heartbroken at the same time. As I was finishing up an interview with a pastor, I asked him how I could be praying for him. Pastor Metys spoke up and said that we need to see his house because he lives in a hen house. So we got up and went out the back of the church to his "house." My jaw dropped. He literally lived in a 12ft x 6ft shack that had chicken wire covered with cardboard for walls. There were two mattresses, separated by sheets hanging from the tin roof. I couldn't believe it. Oh, did I mention that he has a pregnant wife and six children that also live there with them? I was at a loss for words. I was afraid to start praying because I knew that I would get emotional. But I prayed. I'm thankful that God is omniscient and knows what we need before we say it, or even think it. I'm thankful that he knows the desires of my heart and that he knows how I felt for that family. I'm thankful that even though I didn't know how to pray for them, he still knew what they needed. That was a tough visit, but I am thankful for it because of how God met me in that moment and I knew that even if I didn't have all the words to say in my prayer, he would still know all that was on my heart and mind. What a sweet, sweet thing it is to feel the presence of God in such a moment.

I'm thankful that God is allowing me to experience moments like that. Moments that break my heart for his people. Moments that make me realize how fortunate I am. Moments that make me see what true dependence on God looks like. Moments that allow me to see just how important this work is. God has blessed me to be a blessing to others. In that moment, I was able to show that family that God sees them, he hears our prayers, they aren't forgotten, they aren't abandon. I could encourage them with truth. God is not finished with them yet! Better days are coming! I pray that they know that. That they are encouraged. I pray that God continues to break my heart for what breaks his. I pray that he continues to show me how good he is, how faithful he is.

Today was encouraging because Kristin, the other American here who has been working at the orphanage in La Coste for Jephthe, and I were able to bring all the boys from La Coste to the clinic to be seen by the doctor. He was super sweet with them all and really did a good job. I was reminded of how much God cares for the orphans and the widows today. I got to hold a sweet little boy in my arms for hours as he slept. I picked him up because he had been crying and almost immediately his cry turned to a little whimper and then stopped completely. He just wanted to be seen, to be held, to be cared for. Sometimes, I feel like that's how I can be with God. I just want him to hold me, to reassure me that he is bigger than all of my problems, all of my failures, all of my doubts. I want to be reminded that I'm not alone in this, I have a Heavenly Father who loves me, cares for me, who hears me and is in control. Children are such a great reminder of how gentle God can be, how compassionate he can be, and how comforting he can be. Matthew 19:14, "Jesus said, 'Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.'" What a perfect thing to be reminded of in a country full of young children running around. 

This trip has been such a learning experience for me. I cannot say thank you enough to all of you who have been praying for me, who supported me financially, and who have sent me words of encouragement. I am so thankful the time that I am getting to spend here. God has been deepening my relationship with him, growing my relationship with my friends here, and revealing to me so many new things. I am excited for the second half! 

So far, I have felt very healthy and have not had many problems at all. Praise God! You can also thank God with me that I have not had any problems or accidents on the moto! But, if you would, please continue to pray for strength, energy, health, and safety for this second half of the trip. As the number of churches I visit continues to grow, so does the distance to travel to get to them. Pray that God would continue to bless me with stability and control on the moto. Finally, I ask that you would continue to pray for my spiritual growth, that God would continue to show me new things and teach me new lessons through His Word and through my experiences here. I think that it is only appropriate to end with this, I'm livin' on a prayer! 

Moto Mania.

Today we went further out to a few churches. I drove myself and Elisee rode with Pastor Matey. After the first church, we picked up a guy to take us to the second church, so Elisee rode with me. We drove through a little market and I didn’t hit anyone or anything (I did have a close encounter with a pig though). Overall, I would say I did pretty well navigating the rocky terrain and going up and down hills. After the second church, we drove a little ways and then stopped. Matey said that we need to leave my moto at this random lady’s house because it was dangerous going down the mountain. So we went three deep down a steep and curvy mountain. Let me tell you, the view was gorgeous! If we weren’t riding three deep, I definitely would have tried to take some pictures. Green, rolling hills with a river flowing through them. Li bel anpil (it’s very beautiful)! We got down to the church and were greeted by the sweetest children and family. Upon entering the church, it was evident that they lived inside of it. They quite literally lived in the Lord’s house. It also appeared that they lived off the land. As we were waiting for the pastor to arrive, they were picking mangos, shelling peanuts, and had some kind of bean drying in the sun. While we were sitting out in the shade waiting, the sweet boy climbed into what I was told was an orange tree, but it looked more like a like tree to me, that is if limes even grow on trees. Anyways, next thing you know, fruit is falling from the tree and the boy is just up there singing and swinging around on the limbs and branches. I’m going to take a wild guess and say he has done this before. After our interview with the pastor, we headed back up the mountain and stopped to get my moto. I paid the lady a little bit of money and we were back on our way. We made it back to Jephthe’s with no problems or accidents. 

I have enjoyed these past couple days so much and really feel like the work I am doing will serve a great purpose. As I meet all these pastors and see their churches, I can’t help but think how great their reward will be in heaven. I also can’t help but think about how blessed we are back home. Our churches have walls, a roof, seating, electric, musical instruments, microphones, A/C and heating, etc... I wonder how the answers would compare if I asked the same questions back home, like, “What’s your vision for this church?” and, “What are your needs as a church?” 

I’m thankful that God has blessed us abundantly. I’m grateful that he has. My prayer is quickly becoming that I do not take it all for granted. That I am a good steward of the blessings bestowed upon me. I pray that God continues to soften my heart for these people and their churches. That I continue to learn what dedication and faithfulness to Christ looks like. That I continue to learn that the church is more than just a building. Would I go to church if I didn’t have a seat, a comfortable climate, and a good worship band? Would I faithfully devote my life to Christ if I had next to nothing? 

These are some of the thoughts and questions that are rattling around in my head as I am rattling around on a moto. I hope that my thoughts and my questions can help you examine your own life and relationship with Christ. 

I ask that you continue to pray for health and safety as I spend my time down here. Also, I ask that you pray for Elisee and the rest of the orphans in Cap as they mourn the loss of their brother, Wilguens. For those who don’t know, Wilguens succumbed to his battle with cancer on Sunday night. He was only 16 years old. He was one of the boys our youth group supported for quite some time. We will be going to Cap this weekend to attend his wake and funeral. Finally, I ask that you would pray that God would continue to teach me, mold me, challenge me, and help me to grow and mature in my faith and relationship with him. 

Don't Get Distracted.

          This week, I'm going to switch gears a little and not talk about Radical because of something that happened the other day that God used to speak to me. I hope that this story of how God used something so simple to teach me encourages you.

          Sunday evening, Miranda and I went on a hike with Scott and Bethany. We were hiking through the trails along the Clearfork Reservoir (which by the way, if you have never hiked here I highly recommend it, especially while the sun is starting to set). As we were on our way back to the car, the sun was setting over the water, painting a beautiful image of oranges, pinks, purples and golds. It was so beautiful. Sunsets are one of my favorite natural works of art. Anyways, as we were walking, Miranda tripped over a tree root in the path. After she regained her balance, we both laughed, and she said, "I wasn't even paying attention. I was looking at how pretty it is!" I smiled and agreed, but inside I heard the Holy Spirit speaking to me.
          I allowed it to all sink in over the next couple days and spent today unpacking all that was in that moment. I am going to try to break it down part by part.
          Let's begin with the path. I'm sure you can guess that this path represents life, more specifically, our walk in life. There is a vast array of paths that a person can take in life, all leading to one of two places, heaven or hell. For those of us who have confessed with our mouths that Jesus is Lord and believe in our hearts that God has raised him from the dead, then we are saved (Romans 10:9). Our path will lead to heaven. However, there is a false assumption that just because we are saved, our path will not have any obstacles in it. This, my friends, is not true. We can expect that there will be obstacles of all shapes and sizes. This leads us into the next part, the obstacles.
          On our path as Christians, we will face many obstacles. On the path that we were hiking, there were small obstacles like tree roots, rocks, puddles, branches and things like that. There were also larger obstacles such as tree branches and trees that had fallen across the path. In our lives, these obstacles can be habitual sin, arguments, failed tests, changed plans, getting in trouble, losing a job, divorce, sickness and disease, the death of a loved one or anything else that acts as a speed bump or roadblock in our path walk with Christ. If we aren't careful, these obstacles, small and large, can alter the direction of our paths. They can cause us to lose sight of where we are going. In some cases, we can get so caught up with what is in front of us, we aren't willing to take the detour that God has opened up for us. We want to try to demolish the brick wall in front of us with our own hands or cut up the tree that has fallen in our way with a hand saw, rather than listening to God and following his footsteps around the wall or tree. In my experiences, these alternate routes have been the times when I have seen God do incredible things in my life. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." In other words, when come to these obstacles in our walk, trust in God to take you where he wants to, even if it may not make sense. By submitting to his way, what may seem like a winding road to us, is the straight path that God has set out for your life.
          Finally, let's talk about the sunset. Now the sunset didn't do anything wrong in this story. It was just minding its own business, looking all pretty out over the water. However, it still distracted all of us, Miranda just happened to be the one who tripped. The sunset represents distractions in our lives that cause us to lose sight of where we are going. These distractions, like the sunset, are not always bad things. In fact, they can be really good things! For example, a significant other, your friends, your job, a hobby, money, music and other things like that can be good things to have in your life. There is nothing inherently wrong with those things, but when they become our main focus, then there is a problem. What happens when you try to walk in a straight line with your eyes fixed on something to your right? You can't walk straight, can you? You begin to walk towards what you are looking at. The same thing happens in life. When these distractions become our main focus, we begin to walk off our path towards them, rather than keeping on the path towards God. What lies off the path? Even more obstacles to get caught up in. Friends, this is what the devil is trying to get us to do. He wants us to get distracted, whether it is by a good thing or a bad thing and wander off the path. 1 Peter tells us that "the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." The devil wants us to get distracted, to wander off the path into the brush where he is waiting. However, if we fix our eyes and our minds on heavenly things, we will be less likely to become distracted (Colossians 3:2), and better able to stay on the path that God has for us.
          For those of you who do not have a relationship with Jesus Christ, I pray that God would use these words to draw you to Him. If you want to know more about what I have written or how you can begin a new life with Jesus, please do not hesitate to reach out to me. You are never too far off the path for God to rescue you.
          I want to close by encouraging you to run the race marked out for you. Fix your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith (Hebrews 12:1-2). I think that the verse from the hymn Come, Thou Fount of Every Blessing perfectly sums up what I have written.

O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.

Comfortable in the Uncomfortable.

          Have you ever been driving somewhere, like home from work or to school, and when you get there you realize that you were just completely zoned out while driving? You don't remember how you got there because you were just on auto-pilot, essentially. You make the drive everyday and it becomes second nature. This can be a scary place to be.
          After more than ten trips to Haiti, I found myself in a similar situation. Haiti had become a trip that I could auto-pilot through. It was a little different, every trip is unique and brings its own challenges, but for the most part, these trips had become like second nature.
          For the first four or five years, each trip was new and exciting, they were novel. But after that, they all began to run together. Over the years, Haiti trips just became something that I did, it was like second nature.
          In my experiences, there are comforts that I have here in America: a bed, a nice house, a car, running water, clothes, air conditioning, etc... and over the years, going to Haiti also became comfortable. While staying at Jephthe's, we have running water, a decent bed, a roof over our heads, and good food. Yes it is hot and dirty, it is hard work and there are challenges, but for Haiti, it was still comfortable.
          This past trip to Haiti a few of us were in the truck with Jephthe on our way to Thomassique, which is where we would be spending our week working. On the way there, Jephthe said something along these lines, "The living situation this time is going to be much different," to which Scott and I looked at each other and said, "what do you mean?" Jephthe responded with a single sentence, "I am so thankful you still come." Scott and I both just glanced at each other and thought, "what have we gotten ourselves into?" However, a quote from our book, Radical by David Platt, convicted me when I read it later that week. It said,

“…somewhere along the way we had missed what is radical about our faith and replaced it with what is comfortable. We were settling for a Christianity that revolves around catering to ourselves when the central message of Christianity is actually about abandoning ourselves.” ― David Platt

          This past trip was so good because it took me back outside of my Haiti comfort zone. I had been concerned about my own comforts in this third-world country instead of the lives of the people that we were there to serve, the ones who live there everyday of their lives. I did not want to abandon myself or my comforts. I wanted to go to Haiti and help these people who have nothing, all the while having comforts that I could enjoy. Thankfully, this trip was different. We slept on the roof of a house that did not have running water. We weren't at Jephthe's house with the normal comforts that we have there. This trip woke me up from my auto-pilot mode that I had been in. Another quote from our book put it into perspective as well.

“Radical obedience to Christ is not easy... It's not comfort, not health, not wealth, and not prosperity in this world. Radical obedience to Christ risks losing all these things. But in the end, such risk finds its reward in Christ. And he is more than enough for us.”           ― David Platt

          I fell into the trap of the American dream that life is all about being comfortable and I carried this with me to Haiti. I was there to serve, but I still wanted to be comfortable while down there. I am so thankful that we took this trip when we did because it brought me out of the state of thinking that I was in. This summer, although I will be staying at Jephthe's for the majority of the time, I'm sure there will be some nights that I spend in other places that are much less comfortable than the house in Thomassique. I am not there to be comfortable. I am not there to serve myself. I am there to serve the people of Haiti. I am there to glorify God despite the uncomfortable situations I may be in.

          Thank you for taking the time to read this. I hope that you are encouraged and inspired to pray about what God is doing in your life. If you wish to join me on my journey this summer, you can add me on Facebook, or continue to follow my blog. As always, I ask for your prayers during this time as I prepare, but also this summer while I am there. If you would like to support me financially, you can click here. Thank you again, God bless you.

For Qu.

11-14-2017

His name was Quvonta, Qu for short. I didn’t know him all that well yet, but he was still a teammate. I remember having him in my orientation group at school, showing him around campus, helping schedule his classes, talking with him and his brother about basketball. We practiced together for a few weeks before he went back home to Cleveland for a little while. We chatted in a group message with the rest of the team. He always lifted us up and encouraged us. He wanted to make us better. He was determined to make us better. He was supposed to be back to practice on Monday, but Monday never came for him…

We got the news Sunday morning from Coach in a text that read, “I postponed the game today. There was an incident where Q was shot and killed last night. I don’t know anymore details.” My heart sank. My stomach dropped. How do you take this kind of news? A friend, a teammate, a twin brother, a best friend, a son, dead. Forever gone from this earth. But God, why?! He was only 18! He had so much life left to live! How can you do this? Why would you do this? I don’t understand. Honestly, I probably never will.

As the news spread, I see pictures of Qu on social media. I read stories about the joy he brought to others, the laughs and smiles that were shared with him. I see videos of the silly dance moves that he unashamedly showed off. My heart continues to break. What do you say to your two teammates, one who is his twin brother and the other his best friend? There aren’t words gentle enough to make the tears stop. There aren’t words encouraging enough to lift their spirits. So you say what you can and hope that they know you mean it.

One of the most afflicted men in the Bible, Job, has a lot to teach us about loss. God allowed Satan to take away his family, his livestock, his money and his health. If anyone had a reason to curse God it was him. Upon hearing the news that all of his livestock, his servants, and his children had been killed, the Bible says that Job “got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. The he fell to the ground in worship and said: ‘Naked I came from my mother’s womb and naked I will depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.’” What an atypical response to tragedy. I’ll be the first to admit that more often than not, my initial instinct is not to worship God when tragedy strikes. I want to question God, I want to know why, and I want to know the purpose, the plan. But Job reminds me that the Lord is in control. He gives and he takes away, sometimes unexpectedly and sooner than we would wish. While Job was sitting among the ashes in his mourning, God allowed Satan to take Job’s health, but he had to spare his life. Job was covered in sores from head to toe and the Bible tells us that Job’s wife told him to curse God and die but Job refused. He asked her the question, “Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?” What a great question to ask and to gain perspective. God is God in the good and the bad. He is present in our highest times and our lowest times. He is worthy of our worship on the top of the mountain and in the valley below. As for the questioning of God’s plan, we are reminded in Isaiah 55 that God’s ways and thoughts are not like our own. “‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.’” 

In situations like this one, we want to know why, but we have to have faith, even in the darkest, lowest valley that we find ourselves in. Faith that God is in control. Faith that God does not make mistakes. Faith that God is just. Faith that God will never leave us nor forsake us. Right now, we mourn with those who mourn and pray for peace, comfort, and healing in the lives of those who knew Qu.

Rest easy, Qu. This season is for you. We love you and will miss you. 

Personal Notes.

9/1/2016

Reading: Acts 17 & 18

Acts 18: 9 & 10 – “One night the Lord spoke to Paul in a vision: ‘Do not be afraid; keep on speaking, do not be silent. For I am with you, and no one is going to attack and harm you, because I have many people in this city.”

Don’t be discouraged, don’t stay silent, God is always working and we are in HIS hands. To live is Christ and to die is gain (Philippians 1:21).

Do I really live my life this way? Do I really see dying as gain? Do I live my life as if it is Christ’s? Do I do all things to and for HIS glory? Do I openly share the Gospel? Is evangelism my top priority? Do I actively try to bring the Good News into every conversation and relationship? Do I devote myself to prayer? Do I spend time every day in the Word? Do I put my time with Jesus before everything else? Do I even make time for Him? What am I pursuing? How do my actions, my thoughts, my life reflect my relationship with Christ? What keeps me from following Him wholeheartedly? What am I scared of? Why do I sit silent? Why do I not share this life-changing and life-saving news? Am I afraid of failure? Is it failure if I they don’t accept it or reject it? Or is it failure if I don’t even share it? Am I afraid of what it may cost? Am I afraid what they may think of me? Am I afraid of what God may call me into? Am I afraid of what the Holy Spirit may convict me of? Am I too in love with my sins to give them up? Am I too in love with being comfortable and content with my life as it is, rather than letting it go to experience all that God has for me?

These are the questions that need answered. These are the questions that I really need to be honest with myself about. These are the questions, that no matter how much they cut to my core, no matter how uncomfortable they make me feel, no matter how much they convict me and challenge me to change, to give up my life for the sake of Christ, I need to answer.

Lord, Jesus, I need you now. I need your strength. I need your patience. I need your guidance. I need your boldness. I need your humility. I need your forgiveness. I need your conviction. I need your discipline. I need your persistence and perseverance. Lord, I need you now more than ever. Please come and help me be honest with myself. Help me to be real with myself. What is this life about? It’s not about me. It’s about you. It’s all about You. Come, Lord Jesus and wreck my life with the truth of Your Word and bring me out of this self-satisfying life, into a life that is dedicated and devoted to growing, learning, and sharing about You, the one and only thing that really matters.

Pure Joy.

7/1/2016

When you find yourself between a rock and a hard place, what is your initial response? When you’re face to face with struggle, trials and tribulations, pain, hurt, doubt, how do you respond?

What do you do? Do you say things like, “I wish I could just fast forward through this?” or “What did I do to deserve this?” Maybe you ask God why he is doing this or allowing this to happen.

All too often are initial responses to struggles and to testing trails is to question them, to get mad or frustrated with them. But why is it that it’s not until after we go through it, that we look back and say, “Oh, now I see, God. Now I get why I had to go through that.” Why can’t we respond that way during it? Did God tell us that we won’t face trials? Did He say it would be an easy life? I think there is a reason that we are told to “rejoice always” and “pray continually,” multiple times in the Bible. Life is hard. Life sucks sometimes. Life can knock you down, it can throw you a curveball when you’re thinking fastball, and it can throw you one up in, knocking you back off the plate. Just when you think you have it figured out, something goes wrong, something doesn’t go the way you thought it would. The question is, how do you respond?

I’m guilty of letting it get the best of me all too often. I get angry, I get frustrated, I get depressed. But now, I’m challenging myself, and you, to choose joy. James 1:2-4, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” Consider it what?! Pure joy? God you can’t be for real? There’s no way. That’s too hard. You don’t understand what happened.

Yes, consider it pure joy, child, because I am perfecting you. I am doing more inside of you than you could ever ask or imagine. I am refining you through the flame.

That’s my challenge to you and to me. Consider it pure joy.

“For God, who said, ‘Let light shine out of darkness,’ made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ.

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.”

- II Corinthians 4:6-12

Judge Not.

5/12/2016

In the book of John, in one of the last public messages that Jesus’ gives to the people, he says this, “‘If anyone hears my words but does not keep them, I do not judge that person. For I did not come to judge the world, but to save the world. There is a judge for the one who rejects me and does not accept my words; the very words I have spoken will condemn them at the last day.’” Now, let’s keep in mind that Jesus is fully God, but fully human as well, meaning that while on earth, he faced the temptations of the flesh as well, just like you and me, but  he did not sin, he did not judge these people. How easy is it for us, as Christians, to see the actions of someone and instinctively judge that person? We are so quick to judge others from what we hear, see or even just assume about someone. In today’s society, there are so many lifestyle choices that I do not agree with, nor support. But these words have really challenged me to examine myself and how I think about and treat those who live a lifestyle of sin. As Christians, we are to strive to be Christ-like; treating others as Christ would, walking in step with the Spirit. If we are truly trying to do this, it should change the way we look at other people. If Jesus, while here on earth and battling the flesh just as much as you and me, did not judge these people, then why do we? Why are we so quick to condemn them and judge them? I know that I am guilty of this as well, but if we really want to be like Christ and be a light to this dark world, then we should really take these words to heart, “…I do not judge that person.” Jesus did not judge people while here on earth. That was not his mission, and if it was not his mission, then it surely cannot be ours. We are to be children of the light, bringing truth, hope and love to the world, not judgmental attitudes. I know that we are all human, and because of that, we sin. But I want to challenge you, as reading these words of Jesus have challenged me, to not be so quick to judge others. Instead, let’s really try to follow Jesus’ example and treat those people with love and respect, revealing to them the truth of the gospel and the message of salvation by the way we speak to them, treat them, and love them. Our mission is not to judge the world, but to be children of the light, sharing the message of salvation that is for ALL people.

Be Glorified.

4/29/2016

As I was doing my devotions this morning, I was reading in John 9 and was super encouraged and thought I would share with you all…

“As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, ‘Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?’ ‘Neither this man nor his parents sinned,’ said Jesus, ‘but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.’” – John 9:1-3

These verses really stuck out to me for a few reasons. In life, we often hear the words and question, “Why do bad things happen to good people?” or the opposite, “Why do good things happen to bad people?” In my life, especially recently, these questions have been a constant theme throughout recent events. I tend to get frustrated and unfortunately, begin to question God about why he allows certain things to happen. Unfortunately, I allow myself to feel entitled to only good things happening to me because I am following God. I think that because I am doing my best to walk the path that God has for me, he should reward me for that. Honestly, I could not be more wrong in this thinking. God allows certain things to happen so that HE can be glorified. In the good, in the bad, in the uncertain, He can be glorified. Without struggles, hardships, pain, loss, tragedy, uncertainty, etc… why would we follow Jesus? We follow Jesus out of love and devotion, trust and hope. If we truly believe Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose,” then we should not question the struggles and difficult times. We should not question why bad things happen to good people and vice versa. We should not feel entitled to only the good outcomes, only the good circumstances, only the good things in life because we follow Christ. Sometimes, God allows certain things to happen so that He can be glorified. That’s it. Whatever we go through, good or bad, the only question we should have is, “How can I glorify God through this?” because, just like in these verses, the only reason the man was born blind was “so that the works of God might be displayed in him.”

I pray that this is an encouragement to you as well. We serve a great God that is in complete control of every situation! Praise Him!